What is the ideal, according to Paul Tournier? “Growing old together, husband and wife can come to know a love which is, in a way, a prefiguration of heaven, for it is less tumultuous than the love of youth, being less directed towards selfish pleasure-seeking, and because a slow advance in mutual comprehension permits more authentic communication.” […]
George Sweeting writes: “Age adds maturity and richness to life. Age smooths the rough edges of life and adds gentleness and compassion. They say: ‘The older the violin, the sweeter the music.’ Some speak of seniors as ancient, faded, frail, shriveled, senile, withered, wrinkled, and worthless!” I prefer to say seniors are “experienced, dependable, mature, patient, seasoned, steady, wise, tested, survivor, and veteran!” […]
Seneca faces old age and death as only a Stoic could. “Old age is a time of life that is weary rather than crushed.” Nevertheless, I am thankful, “for age has not damaged my mind, though I feel its effects on my constitution. Only my vices” “have reached senility; my mind is strong,” “it is alert,” “it declares that old age is when it blooms.” “My mind bids me to consider how much this peace of mind and moderation of character I owe to wisdom and how much to my time of life; it bids me to distinguish carefully what I cannot do and what I do not want to do.” “There is only one chain that binds us to life, and that is the love of life.” […]
Tournier reminds us that we may experience many successes, but as we grow older, “success retreats, and escapes us, it is limited, unfulfilled.” “When one comes to the end, a man’s life is nothing much.” “Professional life is over, and it finishes unfinished. This is a prefiguration of death, in which the whole of life will finish it, too, being unfinished. That is the dramatic contradiction of death.” Quoting Robert Mehl: “An end, but not a fulfilment, that is the face of death.” […]
Paul Tournier notes: “Freud defined psychological health under the double heading of aptitude for love and for work.” But Paul Tournier cautions that “the superficial relationships of working life and of sexual attraction must lead to a deeper personal commitment. And I believe that no commitment can be truly personal unless it takes on a transcendent dimension and become love, in the biblical meaning of the word.”
Paul Tournier is grateful: “As an intellectual, I am specially privileged. It is true that the better educated people are, the more chance they have to enjoy their retirement. First, intellectual work” is not physically taxing. “Second, the capacity for intellectual work is retained longer than physical ability. It can even increase in old age as long as disease does not affect the mental faculties. But most of all, the more one exercises one’s mind, the more pleasure it gives to exercise it. The more one learns, the more one wants to learn, and the easier study becomes.” […]
Who do we consider to be old? Jimmy Carter recollects: “In general, our own age determines who we consider to be an old person. When I was in the navy and serving on my first ships, I assumed that officers and men who were retiring after twenty years of service were old, and that those who held on for a maximum of thirty years were almost too set in their ways to deal with the changing realities of modern navy life.” […]
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